Shining through the Sorrow

So... it has occurred to me recently that my life will never again look the same.  I'm not getting all deep on you, I'm just saying this year is going to look differently than any other year I've lived. Kyle starts his Master's classes and has prayerfully decided to become a Young Life leader once again.  Joel starts Pre-School three times a week, which will leave this household feeling empty and quiet.  As a SAHM (stay-at-home-Momma), my life has never included dropping a kid off to school, or spending evenings alone - which only makes the long days seem longer!  Since I stopped working four years ago, I've been able to come and go as I please, doing whatever I wanted with my littles.  And now someone else will be molding and shaping my little man!!  It's just kind of surreal. For awhile now, whenever I'm having a tough moment, I just remind myself that this is just a season of life I'm in.  When the kids are crazy or I don't feel like I see...

So, last week I was participating in a 7-day challenge through my church.  It was tough, but it was amazing.  Everyday was a new challenge and I'll just say I wasn't able to do them all.   At one point I realized my family was under spiritual attack.  Not sure how you feel about that term, but trust me - there was no other explanation.  There was a day of crazy sickness in my household, and then there's the radio in our Jeep that just stopped working, leaving me unable to listen to worship music everywhere I went.  And of course, Gabe's 3rd Heavenly Birthday was during this week and one of our final challenges was held in the Funeral Home where we held his services.  (!!)  But, by the end of the week, I was left completely and totally blessed. One of the first challenges was to tithe 10 percent of your day to God, meaning to spend 2.5 hours a day in devotion to Him.  This seemed impossible at first, but soon I was literally craving tha...

You're welcome... Yellow Balloons for the Birthday Boy Rainbow Pizza!! My gorgeous girl enjoying her cupcake... Friendship and Sunlight Rainbow Cupcakes - GORGEOUS Releasing our Heavenly Messages Up, Up, and Away!

Today would have been Gabriel's third birthday. My "Gabey Baby" is now more of a Gabey Toddler. And, not surprisingly, the weather mirrored my mood all day. I woke up to fog, clouds and rain. But by this evening, it was warm and sunny. Tonight's angelversary was simply amazing. I left feeling completely uplifted, blessed, and loved. So, if you were there - Thank You. If you were not, here's the speech I read this evening... "Welcome everyone! Kyle and I just wanted to say a few words. I'm realizing that I'm more of a writer than a speaker, so you will all be read to. So many people don't understand why I'm celebrating what would be my son's third birthday or why I'm just not over this sad thing that happened in my life. And I really want to explain why I will NEVER forget him, but the ironic thing is that if you're HERE- you get it. You understand that Gabriel is a permanent member of my family, even if his spot is empty. You ...

This significant event and The Gabriel Fund were both created shortly after my son passed away in August 2009.  While pregnant with him, my husband and I were urged to terminate his pregnancy after he was given a fatal diagnosis when I was 20 weeks along.  We made the difficult decision to carry him to term, allowing God to decide when he would enter Heaven, and we were graced with two hours with our son before he passed away.  As Gabriel's Momma, I am very passionate about keeping his memory alive and making sure that any events held to honor him also serve an eternal purpose.  Gabriel's Walk & 5K is held in October because it's National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month.  So, mark your calendars for SATURDAY OCTOBER 13th and get registered!!  Here's the information you've all been waiting for!!! First, if you or someone you know wants to DONATE without participating, here are step-by-step instructions on how to do that on Y...

It’s only the sixth day of this lovely month, and I’m already feeling the heavy weight of sadness.   Last week, we were vacationing with family in Chincoteague.   The vacation was heavenly.   It really was.   So many awesome people surrounding us, making us laugh, helping with our kids.   It was a time of relaxation and bonding. But there was this feeling I couldn’t shake off.   I tried going for a run, and everything just hit me.   The last time we were in this town, vacationing with these people, was three years ago exactly. I was very pregnant with Gabriel, and anticipating his arrival at any moment.   We weren’t even sure if we should go on a vacation so far away.   I actually started having frequent, painful contractions during our trip home.   I remember thinking, “Great timing, Lord!”   But, that was the start of two weeks of false labor before we actually got to meet our sweet angel. I guess being in that same pla...