The Snow has Melted
I haven't blogged in a long time. It's not that I've been that busy. It wasn't because I didn't have anything to say. Sometimes when I'm really not doing well, I want to hide that. It's too raw to put out on the world wide web. I've still been writing all winter long, but it's been inside the pages of a journal instead of behind a keyboard.
I've been going through some stuff. Stuff too ugly to describe on here. Only a few people knew what I was wrestling with, and those who only knew I was having hard time attempted to comfort me by saying I'd feel better once Spring was here. That Winter was just so hard and cold. As sweet as they were, their well-meaning explanations frustrated me. Clearly, they didn't understand the severity of the situation. Did they honestly think I'd feel better just because the snow had melted?
And here's the crazy part. They were pretty much right. I look around and it truly feels like I'm experiencing Spring for the first time. Sure there are other factors which help their conclusion ring true - a change in medications (ha!), hours spent in a counselor's office, and lots of prayer. Hard prayer, like crying out to God on my knees prayer. But this morning as I reflect, I realize that it's like my mind completely forgot that all those barren trees surrounding my house would soon be blooming, blanketing me and my family with gorgeous green leaves. I forgot the winter view out my living room, of a dirty plowed street - would be replaced by flourishing bright bushes, shrubs, and trees.
You see, I think it was more than just the literal change in seasons. I think that even though it's hard to remember when you're in the thick of it, the bad times in our lives only really last for a "season." Nothing lasts forever, not the icy branches or the bitter cold. Obviously some seasons last longer than others, but we can rest in the truth that the sun will shine again. That our "joy will come in the morning."
For those of you in the midst of a difficult time - Praying your tough season begins to thaw, and that the warm Spring winds will remind you that God is near, He has not left you nor forsaken you.
I've been going through some stuff. Stuff too ugly to describe on here. Only a few people knew what I was wrestling with, and those who only knew I was having hard time attempted to comfort me by saying I'd feel better once Spring was here. That Winter was just so hard and cold. As sweet as they were, their well-meaning explanations frustrated me. Clearly, they didn't understand the severity of the situation. Did they honestly think I'd feel better just because the snow had melted?
And here's the crazy part. They were pretty much right. I look around and it truly feels like I'm experiencing Spring for the first time. Sure there are other factors which help their conclusion ring true - a change in medications (ha!), hours spent in a counselor's office, and lots of prayer. Hard prayer, like crying out to God on my knees prayer. But this morning as I reflect, I realize that it's like my mind completely forgot that all those barren trees surrounding my house would soon be blooming, blanketing me and my family with gorgeous green leaves. I forgot the winter view out my living room, of a dirty plowed street - would be replaced by flourishing bright bushes, shrubs, and trees.
You see, I think it was more than just the literal change in seasons. I think that even though it's hard to remember when you're in the thick of it, the bad times in our lives only really last for a "season." Nothing lasts forever, not the icy branches or the bitter cold. Obviously some seasons last longer than others, but we can rest in the truth that the sun will shine again. That our "joy will come in the morning."
For those of you in the midst of a difficult time - Praying your tough season begins to thaw, and that the warm Spring winds will remind you that God is near, He has not left you nor forsaken you.
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