Meeting Angie Smith

Almost a month ago now, I had the amazing opportunity to meet Angie Smith! She is married to the lead singer of the Christian band, Selah, and the story of their daughter Audrey is heard through their song "I Will Carry You." (Click here to listen that song, and see amazing photographs from her family.)  I haven't seen it yet, but I just read that the Duggars found so much comfort through those lyrics, that they used them in the episode about losing their sweet daughter, Jubilee.

Along with being a mom of, now, FIVE girls, Angie is also amazingly funny - both in person and on her blog, Bring the Rain. She's an author of two books, and although she's very frightened by it, is an amazing public speaker! She's so real, so hysterical, so lovely.

I had the great privilege of hearing her speak at the One Day Women of Faith Event in Baltimore, MD... and that's where it happened... I met her! Like, in person! And, got to speak to her! Can't wait to tell you all about it!

She spoke about her daughter, Audrey, how they received her diagnosis, how she had no amniotic fluid and therefore no kidneys. She spoke about how they were instructed to terminate the pregnancy. She spoke about still having hope... As I sat there, weeping, I couldn't believe just how similar our stories were. She shot a picture on the screen of her daughter getting weighed. My heart sank. She looked JUST like Gabriel. She never said the words "Potter's Syndrome," but maybe she just realized her specific diagnosis didn't matter. Her daughter's short life is what mattered. The diagnosis, the decision to carry to term, the TWO HOURS she had with her daughter, the heartbreaking moment when you have to place your baby into the arms of a stranger because there is no life inside. Man, it hit home. Hard.

Her story. It's MY story. Another speaker that day talked about the biggest lie Satan whispers in our ears, "You're all alone." So often we feel like whatever we're going through, we are alone. No one else has ever experienced it. What a lie! I think it's in that loneliness that we cave inward, and the depression sets in. This one day event reminded me that no matter what we're going through, we are NOT going through it alone. Not only are we surrounded by people who have been in our shoes, but we have a Heavenly Father who never once left our side.

At one point she asked everyone in the audience to stand if they had experienced the loss of a child. I could hear a woman behind me just wailing as she stood to her feet. A friend of mine, sitting right next to me, stood with me. She had also felt this pain. Another friend later told me that it looked like half the room stood up. We wondered if it was that common, or if people with losses were there that day to hear Angie, knowing they'd hear from a woman who knows where they've been.

So, getting back to meeting her...

First of all, I should tell you how devastated I was when I thought I wasn't going to meet her. There was some confusion about when and where the speakers would be for book signings, and as I waited in line to purchase her latest book (cause apparently they won't just sign your bra), I missed out on her first signing! And, at that point, I wasn't sure if there was going to be another opportunity. My dear friend, Tricia, totally played my advocate and was trying to convince security that I HAD to meet her. Our stories were just TOO similar. So, although they didn't allow me to jump in line, they did inform us of when she'd be doing it again, and suggested we leave our seats a little early to be sure to get in line. And, that we did! We were FIRST in line!!

I should also note, that during her talk she spoke about her love for Beth Moore, and how much
she has influenced her life and her relationship with Christ. And she joked several times about the restraining order being lifted, etc, which I thought was hilarious. So, upon meeting her I totally said, "First of all, you should know that you are MY Beth Moore." Haha!!

I knew there were a lot of people behind me, so I quickly showed her the picture of Gabey I keep in my purse. She gasped. I'm not exaggerating! She said, "He looks just like Audrey!" I said, "I know!!" Her daughter, Kate (seen in the picture above) wanted to see the picture as well. Angie explained to her that I also had a baby in Heaven, and that we had very similar stories. Kate took the book Angie was supposed to sign, and started drawing. More on that later...

I wanted Angie to know how much her song, and her book, and her testimony meant to me. So I told her about how we played "I Will Carry You" at Gabe's 1st birthday, and explained that we call it his Angelversary. And I told her that since we received Gabe's diagnosis, I started a blog, and that I had her song on my blog. "Really?!" Um... yeah... Really.

Back to the book... Poor Angie, knowing there were a lot of people to get through, was trying to hurry her little artist along. At one point Kate looked up and said, "Do you have any other babies?" So, I told her, "Yes, one boy and one girl." She continued drawing... Moments later, Angie tried to take the book so she could sign it and Kate shooed her hand away! Haha!! I literally moved out of the way, and stood behind Kate until she was finished, so that others could start coming up. When she was done, Angie gracefully signed my book and Kate explained, while pointing, "This is your baby in Heaven." She wrote, "I love you baby" under her amazing drawing of all three of my kids. Enjoy! 

And, yes, it looks like "I love you babs."  (Maybe she has a love for Barbra Streisand??)